Table of Contents
Introduction and Background Info
Although LawYou helps nonlawyers represent themselves in all sorts of cases, we dedicate a lot of time and space to helping survivors of domestic violence or intimate partner abuse. Here’s why.
When the Legal Consultation Ministry (LawYou’s predecessor) was created back in 2008, Sherri Renner figured that people involved in the family courts would not need the kind of help that was being offered. The Florida courts had established self-help centers throughout the state, with most of the resources in those centers being family-law-oriented. That demographic is covered, Sherri thought.
It wasn’t until she began the work of helping nonlawyers represent themselves that Sherri learned that, despite the available resources, people enmeshed in family courts have the greatest need for assistance. This seeming paradox stems from several factors:
- The equitable nature of family court actions, which allows judges a lot of discretion,
- The parties themselves, who may be using the courts to harass, abuse, or remain in contact, and
- Judges, who may not be trained or motivated to discern when their courtrooms are being used for improper purposes.
These dynamics are especially prevalent in family court matters that do not resolve quickly and cooperatively. Because the stakes are high, we give these matters high priority.
Address Confidentiality Programs
More than half of states provide survivors of stalking, sexual assault, and domestic violence with a program that furnishes a legal substitute address and mail forwarding. These are known as address confidentiality programs, and we’ve seen them work well to protect survivors.
This website lists states with these programs and provides links to the relevant web pages for signing up. The photo links to Colorado’s program.
If your state is not on the list, reach out to your state attorney general to inquire whether a confidentiality program has been initiated. If no such program exists in your state, please contact us and we will help at no or low cost.
Changing Your Social Security Number
Social Security Numbers are assigned at birth and cannot be changed unless certain conditions are met. Situations involving harassment, abuse, or life endangerment are among the conditions allowing for an SSN change request to the Social Security Administration.
Chelli Pumphrey, LPC, CCTP-II, NAST
Chelli Pumphrey, LPC, CCTP-II, NAST, is a Licensed Professional Counselor and Level II Certified Clinical Trauma Professional with over 30 years of experience. She is also a Certified Narcissistic Abuse and Survivor Treatment Clinician, specializing in complex trauma, adult attachment, and recovery from narcissistic abuse and toxic relationships, using integrative healing practices such as EMDR and psychedelic assisted therapy.
A survivor of narcissistic abuse herself, Chelli brings a unique depth of empathy and understanding to her work. She knows firsthand how confusing, devastating, and isolating these relationships can be—and is passionate about offering the informed, validating support she once needed.
She is the author of Insight is 20/20: How to Trust Yourself to Protect Yourself from Narcissistic Abuse & Toxic Relationships, and co-hosts The Toxic Free Relationship Club, an online membership community for survivors. She also provides clinical consultation, training, and speaking on topics related to intimate partner violence, narcissistic abuse, and trauma recovery.
Chelli also hosts the Women’s 6-Week Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Group for women healing from narcissistic, antagonistic, or pathological abuse
The Way Out
with Sharon Riegie Maynard
“What we are seeing in our country today are tips of a very large field of icebergs which, left unchecked, will continue to destroy lives. Situations such as domestic violence, depression, and suicide are warning us. Unconscious patterns, unresolved trauma, of hidden agendas of domination are showing up in greater numbers in our world and need to be addressed in new ways.”
Is the answer to stop being aware?
That is an option.
I am offering another possibility. Look for ways to know more.
For the remainder of 2026, I am sharing information, processes, and practices, from the Galactic soul’s history. My intention is to widen your view and give options.
The Directory at SurvivorTreatment.com
The Association for NPD/Psychopathy Survivor Treatment, Research & Education (SurvivorTreatment.com) was created by Sandra Brown, MA (founder of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education, and author of Women Who Love Psychopaths, now in its third edition), to take her decades of education, experience, insights, and research and create a new model of care specific to DV/IPV survivors and their unique experiences and treatment needs.
Sandra’s model of care has been the foundation for highly specialized training for therapists that leads to either a certificate or certification in narcissistic abuse treatment.
Therapists who have taken extra specialization training and extra certifications in both trauma and narcissistic abuse, are listed on the Directory at SurvivorTreatment.com.
Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit
The Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit is a web-based app that helps victims to document the abuse they suffer. According to the website, the EAA:
tells the victim’s stories, histories and experiences that are preserved and stored on their behalf. It helps give the victim back power and control over their situation. …It allows the voice of the victim to be heard, even when they are not able to tell their story.
The EAA was created by Susan Murphy Milano, who was a specialist and expert in intimate partner violence and worked nationally with corporations, faith based organizations, domestic violence programs, law enforcement and prosecutors.
Institute for Relational Harm Reduction
LawYou works with Sandra Brown, M.A., founder of the Institute for Relational Harm Reduction and Public Pathology Education.
The Institute is a rapidly growing body of people seeking to impact public education surrounding issues related to pathology, personality disorders, and psychopathy.
This growing body are survivors—women, men and their children who have sustained psychological injury because of someone else’s pathology.
Sandra is a thought and research leader into personality traits of and trauma-informed care for survivors. She’s the author of the acclaimed Women Who Love Psychopaths and creator of the Living Recovery Program.
The Living Recovery Program is a comprehensive and affordable approach to recovery from a Pathological Love Relationship with a Cluster B/Psychopathic partner.
LRP consists of 51 weekly lessons (plus a finale) with educational and guided recovery topics, tips, techniques, resources, and helpful tools delivered in an online, self-study format which you can access from the comfort of your home.
For more information or to register, click the puzzle pieces image
Mother Justice Network
and the Justice TIPs App
Mother Justice Network‘s purpose is to “unleash ‘Superhero Survivors’ of abuse, and equip communities for effective response to family violence.” They vow to “change how community professionals work with protective parents and their children to create safety for families chronically targeted by abusers.”
Toward that goal, MJN has created the Justice TIPs app to connect trauma survivors to trauma-informed professionals.
Nancy Fingerhood, MSW, LSW
Nancy Fingerhood, MSW, LSW, is an Ohio licensed social worker with past experience in counseling children and working as a medical social worker and forensic interviewer at a children’s hospital.
She has experience as an advocacy volunteer for a non-profit to help parents and children affected by domestic abuse.
She is a counselor at a private agency in Ohio.
Read more about Nancy at LinkedIn and Insight Clinical Counseling & Wellness.
National Domestic Violence Hotline
“The Hotline,” as it’s widely known, is a federally-funded service with lots of resources for victims and survivors, including considerations for safety plans. Follow the link to the website or call 800-799-7233.
The Hotline® is the only 24/7 center in the nation that has access to service providers and shelters across the U.S. Today, The Hotline continues to grow and explore new avenues of service.
Pursuing Justice Foundation
Pursuing Justice Foundation is LawYou’s nonprofit arm. It was created to assist
self-represented litigants with the educational and monetary support they need to present their cases effectively and create meaningful records.
…
By providing guidance and essential expense assistance, the Foundation boosts nonlawyers’ opportunities to present their cases effectively, which in turn brings greater overall equity into the courts.
PJF also is home to National Pro Se Day, which provides a unified national platform from which the people can speak to the courts about their experiences.
SHARP Assessment
The Stalking and Harassment Assessment and Risk Profile (SHARP) is a research-informed safety management tool to educate and inform decision-making about stalking or harassment situations.
The result will have two parts. The first part summarizes the responses to SHARP questions and provides a basic risk profile. The second part provides suggested actions that someone being targeted with stalking, harassment, and threats might take to improve their safety, based on the specific situation reported in the SHARP questions.
Some Relevant Posts
John Shares His Experience
by Sherri L. Renner, J.D. | October 31, 2014 “Why would you pay a lawyer $250 an hour to try and collect $150?” the judge
C.R.’s Story of Legal Abuse
One day many years ago, C.R. met a handsome and charming man. That’s right – her nightmare began, as they often do, as a dream.
From Terror to Triumph: How Jenna Overcame Her Anxiety and Won in Family Court
Jenna* had been embroiled in litigation with her ex-husband for years. Every so often he would bring some trivial matter to the court, painting Jenna
Should I Convince the Judge my Ex is a Narcissist?
Question I just listened to your interview posted from the WNAAD event. Thank you. It seems you suggest that litigants shouldn’t draw attention to the
“Legal Abuse” Introduction
by Sherri L. Renner, J.D. October 2014; updated March 2015 Legal abuse can be an unexpected and sometimes tragic extension of domestic or intimate partner
Legal Abuse from a Clinical Perspective
by Sherri L. Renner, J.D. October 2014; updated March 2015 “Courtrooms are the perfect platforms for abusers to maintain contact with their victims,” reports Sandra
Join the Association for Pro Se Advancement. See the home page for more information and a list of benefits, or follow this link to register.
